There is Sun

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I'm feeling a bit off this past week or so. Scattered. Unfocused. Anxious. Uninspired. Worried. Unmotivated. Full of doubt. With all of those feelings, there comes a major lack of creativity. major. 

This is so NOT in the plan. 

I think it's the weather. The cold. The piles and piles of snow. I am blessed that I don't have to go out of the house to a job each and everyday to fight through the temperatures and the mounds of white stuff all over. But with that comes a bit of that "stuck at home" feeling, and somedays I hate it. 

I have these pieces of paper all over, sketchbooks and doodles, inspiring thoughts and quotes that someday should be on a canvas . . . I look at them scattered on my table and try to muster up the courage to put them into some art . . . but just can't. 

I'm not there. 

And it's frustrating. 

Call it a creative block. Call it winter blues. Whatever you call it . . . just send some happy thoughts my way, and kindly ask it to leave. 

I'm forcing myself to exercise each day . . . riding my exercise bike between 1 to 5 miles each morning. I'm making a conscious effort to lower my sugar intake, as I know sugar effects my overall mood. I'm even cutting down my coffee to only one cup a day (where I was easily a three cup drinker). Trying to pin point what it is that is pulling me from being centered. 

Last night, Katie said, "Mom . . . I don't like when you have that worried look on your face. It makes me sad." 

I didn't realize I was wearing it on my face, but clearly I am. I love the honesty that a child can bring to you. Up front and center. Deal with it. 

"I'm sorry, honey," I told her. "Mommy is just fine." 

And I am. I know I am. 

I think. ;)

I'm hanging with a couple of my soul sisters on Saturday, and have plans for dinner with three more next week. I think I need them a lot more than they know. Sometimes I feel it is unfair - how much I pull from them. I wonder if they get anything back from me, in return. 

Maybe I need to keep the focus on that . . . . moments of truth. And gratitude for them. 

The sun is coming out right now. It's a fridged 2 degrees out today. But, there is sun. It looks warm, welcoming, bright and alive.

I think I need to stand in it. Close my eyes and face it. Just to feel it. 

Yes, because even in darkness . . . there is sun. 

Wishing you Peace, my friends. 

Xo

Comments

  1. scrapwordsmomFebruary 7, 2014 at 9:01 AM

    I could have written this EXACT same post, Leanne! Seriously!! We have been snow bound for weeks now and I am getting overwhelmed and depressed by it all. And like you I have notes everywhere of inspiration, sit down to put it on paper and canvas and...nothing. At least we recognize...we will get our creative groove back friend!! And look at you....WRITING like you promised yourself you and would. You are gifted sweet friend!! Just sayin....;)

    Peace and love to you this weekend!!!

    ReplyDelete
  2. hollieFebruary 7, 2014 at 12:53 PM

    Hello to my most favroite person in the world!!!!
    You got this - you are awesome - dont over think your greatness!!!
    You will find it in the small things and make it your own.

    lov ya and keep warm!!!

    ReplyDelete
  3. NatFebruary 8, 2014 at 4:01 PM

    It's a bad time of the year, Leanne :-( Loads of people feeling listless, lethargic, lack lustre... generally just lacking that little bit of inspiration.
    Hoping you get your mojo back and sending you all positive thoughts across the pond...
    xxx

    ReplyDelete

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