From Chaos Comes Happiness

I have been inspired since my last post to "Find the Joy", and wanted to hop in today and tell you about this journey and what I am doing. I have to tell you . . . I can already feel the difference within myself. In two short days, I am already taking more time to stop and be - stop and focus - stop and breath. All of it. The goal, and what my plan is . . . is to post photos of items and moments each and every day when I have FOUND the JOY. My goal is to capture (at least) 100 moments. They will be little things . . . big things . . . anything that has helped me stop the downward spiral that has been happening in my head and has helped me feel joy.   If you want to follow my journey each day - follow me on Instagram here  (side note: you have to have an Instagram account in order to access my Instagram.)  I will also be posting a weekly recap here on the blog.  I am using the hashtag #100JOYFCCH  .  .  . (the FCCH stands for the name of thi...

(This is a continuing story about a recent trip I took with my dear friend, Peggy, to Georgia. You can start at the beginning of our adventure at  this blog post ,  and continue to read one after another.)  Oh, my friends. When last together, I had just finished my 5th blog post about my "Year of Healing" road trip to Plains and Americus, Georgia. With one last post to write . . . I lost my way for a bit.    It turns out in the middle of healing, sometimes your creative voice stalls. And if there is one thing I have learned in the past 6 months, it is the importance of listening to yourself and allowing yourself the time it needs - when it needs it. I thank you for your patience and understanding. Because, my friends, this trip has had a lasting effect on me.  Allow me, if you will, to bring us back to Americus, Georgia and share my final post about a trip that helped me beyond words.  Wednesday, April 3rd, our second day in Americu...

We travel, not to escape life . . . but for life not to escape us.  Oh, friends. The last post I wrote here on my blog was about JOY - the desire to find it, the deep need to see  it, to have it, to believe that it was still possible. And I am still working so very hard at doing that right now. This grief thing has a pretty huge hold over me. But, in the middle of it all, in the middle of the tears and sadness over the loss of my sister . . . I ran away for a few days . . . and found some of the joy I was looking for. And I found it . . . in Georgia. Plains and Americus, Georgia . . . to be exact. One day last fall, my sister sat in our Art Shoppe with me and our dear friend Peggy and said the three of us should travel to Georgia to visit our blog friend, Nicole. I was so surprised that Laura was the one to come up with this idea (because I was usually the one who came up with pretty crazy plans.) I know that she was serious about it, though, because she connec...

My dearest friend Kathleen and I talked last night about Faith. First, while talking on the phone, then continuing our thoughts through text as more things came to our minds on the subject. My friend has always been one of the most faithful individuals in my life. For 40 years, she has been in my life . . . and for 40 years I have admired the constant presence God has had in hers. I have spent a great part of these 40 years trying to learn from her, to follow her examples, to trust, to pray, to do all those things people of great faith do. Some times I have been successful at it. Other times, not so much. She told me last night, as she has told me many times the past few months, "I pray for you everyday... so when you can't pray, I am praying for you." That is a beautiful friend. But, I am trying. I am trying to find my faith. Truly, I am. But the sadness I have been feeling seems greater each day, instead of less. I keep thinking - maybe I am doing somethin...

Well . . . how do you do, dear friend? I am here. My blog. (insert  . . . . HUGE sigh). 2017 was the last time I visited this space in the universe. Sitting here right now, I feel completely lost. Like, I have no idea who the person was who used to write and share thoughts in this online journal of sorts. Although I am still me ( in some regards) . . . in others, I am completely different. I knew it was time to return to the Land of Blog because this blog has always been my therapy. And my friends, I am in need of it. My safe place. My safe place space to cry. My safe place to write. My safe place to share.  Friends, I have a lot to share. A lot of it is good. And some of it . . . is not. The 'not' is where my head is right now . . . where my soul is. My sister. My sister left this world on December 17th. She was diagnosed with a rare and rather agressive form of cancer. She passed 4 weeks after her diagnosis. And my heart is broken. So, I am back. I ...

Lately, I find myself spending a good part of each and every day trying to not have a panic attack - which is absolutely ridiculous, and I get angry just to hear myself say it. I don't know how other people handle it . . . this thing called life.  How they meet all of their responsibilities and deal with everything on their plates without going into a complete and total breakdown is just beyond me. God Bless 'em.   Some days, as I'm driving in the car, I find myself taking deep breaths in and out and counting to 10 just to keep myself from hyperventilating. The car is when I do a lot of thinking - when it all seems to catch up with me. So I breath in and out, over and over, trying to re-group. It all will get done. It all will be fine. I can do this. I tell myself those things . . . over and over again.   And I've got it so easy, too. Really.  I know this as clear as day. I know that there are  people out there that have it bad. Really bad. I don't ...

I'm so proud of my daughters. There are times when I look at the beautiful souls they are becoming, and my heart swells. We talk constantly . . . communication . . . that is the key. When I know that something is really bothering them, I want to talk it through. I've raised them to know that there is nothing that we can't work through - nothing that we can't figure out - nothing that we can't talk about.  When they were younger (3 or 4), the conversations were short and brief. Their worries were simple things that I could always figure out. I almost enjoyed those opportunites, so I could show them how easy the solutions really were. But now, as they get older, some of their questions and concerns have become harder to address.  Things in our extended family life have been challenging this past holiday. Disagreements from years ago resurfaced, certain family members didn't attend holiday gatherings, and feelings of hurt and anger that were long covered over have ...

Oh, the ups and downs. The blues. The dumps. Whatever it is. I'm fighting them. Big time. It's sort of crazy - the emotional state of my creative soul. Up and down . . . feels like one heck of a roller coaster. Am I an artist? Can I do this? Can I make it? What is "making it"? How long can I keep this up? When will I be able to contribute regularly to our family? Will I ever be able to? Is it time to get back to work? Like . . . the kind real work that I used to do? Oh, I feel like I'm on one heck of a roller coaster these days. Up and down . . . and up again. I remember . . . way back when . . . that I used to come to my blog when I found myself in this state of mind. Write it out. The cheapest and most effective form of therapy for me. So, here I am. Putting it out there. Do with it what you will, Universe. Because, like all that I've said before . . . it's me. And it's real. Yes, I've found myself questioning what I am doing, ...

Follow my blog with Bloglovin Oooooo . . . I love awards! There is something so awesomely special about someone taking time out of their day, their life, their moment . . . to share a little happy-goodness with you . It's been a long time since I was involved in a little blogland sort of celebration, but my dearest Nat over at " Just Nat " was incredibly kind to share a "Liebster Award" with me last week. And Nat . . . I am forever grateful!! Just Nat! I adore Nat . . . she is my adventure sister, a photographer extraordinaire, my worldliest of friends, and one of my longest running blog buddies. I don't know how long we have been in each others blog lives (years, I tell you . . . it has been years) . . . but I do know that just months ago I saw my very first photo of HER (the beautiful photos on her blog are usually of her travels and other subjects along her journey) . . . but when I saw my very first photo of HER - her face, her smile - happy t...

We went away for a few days . . . to sunny (and so so hot) Arizona. And there is nothing like renewing the soul a thousand miles away from reality. Nothing like getting away from the laundry, the chores, the worries. Nothing like closing your eyes and feeling the sun work it's magic on your soul. It was a beautiful trip. Swimming, laughter, a few good drinks, quality time with some dear dear friends, and being closer to Gods art. That's what the whole scenery of Arizona looks like to me . . . like God's very own Mixed Media piece. From cactus and desert to His own mountainous cathedrals, I spent the past few days reflecting and taking it all in. And it was . . . wonderful. I thought I'd share some pictures with you of our adventure. Some I've already shared on Instagram and/or Facebook, and some are from our digital camera. These are my very favorite photos from our trip . . . sigh . . . I miss it already . . . Arizona . . . it has to be one of my top...