From Chaos Comes Happiness

                         "And what do you do?" is a question that has bothered me for as long as I can remember.  It bothered me most often during the last three years - after leaving a lifetime (truly - about 25 years) working in healthcare and taking time off to be at home; raising my daughters, taking my mom to doctor visits here or there, doing laundry, making art and keeping our house afloat.   But long before that, it bothered. Because "what do you do?" it is often the question used to define someone. And the answers bother me as much as the question. I am not a person who likes to be defined by what I do.  Because for me . . . I am so much more than my job. So lately, I have been thinking about what defines me.  What is the true, authentic definition of me?  Am I the "insurance lady" in a doctors office? The wanna-be artist? Healthcare worker? A mother? Daughter? Wife? Am I the brownie lea...

      . . . I love life even more than I ever imagined.  Because of them . . .      I   smile wider and laugh longer.  Because of them . . .       I try to be the best person I can be, each and every day.    Because of them . . .       I live this life with more passion, more energy, more faith, more inspiration, more adventures, more focus, more spirit, more excitement, more tenderness, more peace, more love, more joy, more radiance, more abundance, more clarity, more generosity, more purpose, more magic.  Because of them . . .       I live this life with More.  Because of them . . .       I live.  And because of them . . . I thank God, each and every moment.  Wishing you peace, my friends.  xoxo   

                   I love when the Universe calls, you know? When you find yourself almost to the breaking point with thoughts of " life is rough and people can be pretty cruel and there is no way that I can make a difference"  - and then suddenly, a change. When the Universe reminds you of what matters. That yes, even in the simplest of ways, you can make a difference.  Yes, I love when that happens.  And this week, the Universe called me. Twice .  Most of you know that I went back into the work force two months ago - starting a new job at a pediatricians office on December 1st actually. Back in healthcare - the field that I have worked in for almost 25 years. It is a great fit for me (three days a week), and allows me enough flexibility that I can still have plenty of time to live out my creative dreams - and (most importantly) bring additional funds to our home on a regular basis.  Something is different abo...

I think one of my most favorite modern day inventions is the iPhone - or any phone, for that matter, with camera capability. I love being ' at the ready ' and able to capture a special photo almost immediately.  And, yes, I love taking them while on the road.  I love to catch quick glimpses here or there as the seasons unfold right before me.  I love looking back and recalling the exact moment I took the picture - remember where I was going, what my thoughts were on, and what was happening that day - when I stopped to take the photo. We are lucky to be surrounded by some gorgeous roads near my home - and I often find myself lost in the beauty of my surroundings as I travel them.  Trust me, I am always careful when taking a photo. I make sure there aren't other cars around, so I am not putting myself - or anyone else - in danger.  Today, I thought I would share just a few of the pictures I have taken the past few weeks, found while scrolling through my iPhone thi...

                  I have an amazing husband.  Have I told you that before?   I don't want to gloat, or sound like I am bragging. I am not. I am just recognizing one of my biggest blessings, and sharing it with you today. My husband. He is pretty awesome.  In the past few months, he has been top notch.  And sometimes I forget to tell him that.  Because, I guess, the expectation is for him to be this ' Superman '. Not only for me, but for everyone else.  Sometimes, I forget that he is real. Just like you and me.  Sometimes, I forget that he has pressures and stresses - unlike those that I can relate to. He has that "manly" responsibility to care for all four of us - for our home, to pay our bills, provide . . . all those things. Even though he knows we are in this ' together ' - that we work ' together ' - I know he carries the load.  Yes, sometimes I forget that he really has the weight of the world on h...

                  My throat is killing me tonight. Absolutely killing me.  I've been fighting this thing for a whole week. Last Saturday, I saw a doctor and was told I had an ear infection, upper respiratory infection, sinus infection, bronchitis, and a bad cold and cough (I think I told her those last two things.)  I left the visit with a bag full of medicines, and the advice to get as much rest as I could. Antibiotic, cough syrup with codeine, inhaler, nasal spray, and some other cough tablet. The whole kit and kaboodle. And for the past 7 days, I have taken - faithfully - everything prescribed. Followed doctors orders exactly as they were set out for me.  And I am not feeling much better. A little, yes. But not as much as I expected to be feeling, one week later.  In fact this evening, as we sat at the birthday party for a friends daughter, I told Phil that I felt like my throat was getting sore all over again. Again. T...

       I'm doing it.  I am.  I. AM. DOING. IT.  I came to this realization last night, as I was packing up for my next art class at Bedford Park District (takes place Monday night, by the way, and I am really excited about it - because it is different from anything I have offered before.) But . . . I digress . . . as I stood in front of my plastic bin filling it with supplies and counting brushes & canvases - I realized, I am doing it.  I am having my cake . . . and eating it, too.  Over a year ago, Phil and I had a discussion about the idea of me returning to work. At the time, the thought upset me so much - that I think I cried for a number of days and totally shut down. It broke me. I don't know why. No, I take that back. I know exactly why.  I was scared. I was afraid I was going to have to give up this creative life that I have worked so hard to get to in the past three years. I was afraid I couldn't do it all. I was afraid I wo...